Friday, May 29, 2009

Life In Bengalooru With Rajni Sir

One of the items I terribly enjoy on radio is "Life In Bengalooru With Rajni Sir" on Radio One. I "simbly" love it, as Rajni says. My guess is that its RJ Prithvi, but I am not too sure.

I have been meaning to do my take on it from a long time but it took this long for the idea to become a post.
I am personally not too happy with the outcome, but then I had a whale of a time recording and re-recording this stuff. Here it is...wachchaww!!!









Please drop a comment if you liked it.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Elections 09

You know the most breaking news and the first headline item in every news channel on the counting day?
The "exclusive" predictions from the exit polls of their channel turned out to be true. Every goddamn channel had this news, errr story. Now, are people really interested in other news items?

******

Whats the difference between CPI-CPM before the elections and after the elections?
Before they were "Left", now they are left way behind!

******

Even when the trends were coming up, every party was putting up a brave face and telling that these were just trends and things will definitely change when the actual results are out. So confident are all these parties that if some party which had contested in less than 100 seats across the country made a statement that they are sure to form a government on their own, I would have been least surprised.

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During the half way of counting, Rajdeep Sardesai asked a BJP spokesperson if they are willing to concede defeat at the strategic timeout in the Indian Political League (IPL). Both talked metaphorically for what seemed like hours. The spokesperson said that the result can swing in a couple of overs just like in T20. Yeah, if only they did not opt to play like "Knight Riders"! One sad thing about BJP not winning elections is that I am gonna miss Mr. Venkaiah Naidu and his Andhra english which goes something like "The paarty has faarmed the paalicy..."

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I unconditionally hate all the parties which form Third Front, Fourth Front, nth Front etc. More for their creative bankruptcy than their ideologies(or lack of it) Cant they come up with some other meaningless names like Allied Secular Front, Indian Socialist Alliance, Democratic Communist Alliance?

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I think "Singh is King" is the most overused slogan of this decade. Cant the brain dead journos come up with something else? Like this:
Yuvraj(Rahul Gandhi) Singh(Manmohan) storms IPL (Indian Political League)

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Just Wondering...

I am just wondering if the buildings where the terrorist organizations are located have the checkpoints, metal detectors/bomb detectors and such stuff at the exit gate of the building...

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Gulaal Music

The music of "Gulaal" is one of the best that has come out of Bollywood off late. I dont remember an album in the recent history in which I had loved all the songs so intensely. Each and every song is a gem! If only the movie was as good as the music...

The sad thing is, I will be least surprised if I dont hear the names Piyush Mishra, Rekha Bharadwaj or Rahul Ram in this year's award functions in music or lyrics category. That is how Bollywood is supposed to be, right?

You can listen to the songs here:
http://mp3hungama.com/music/index.php?action=album&id=4209

I am so bowled over by this album, I can go on and make a statement that if downloading mp3s were illegal in India, I would have run to the nearest music store and bought this album. Now, I will get back to listening the songs that are running in repeat mode.
Ranaji mhaare...

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Naomi Campbell Saree & A Terrible PJ

Read this hilarious news in, where else, but TOI today:
"Naomi Campbell looked stunning in Vikram Phadnis' saree"

Vikram Phadnis' saree? I am grinning ear to ear whenever I think of that line!

*****

Q: "How does a south Indian bomb insult a north Indian bomb?"
A: By calling it a "bum" :)

Monday, March 02, 2009

Delhi 6

Now, let me tell you a story. During 1929, people were affected by "Depression". Or "The Great Depression" as it was called. Thousands died because of it. People across sections were affected. No one knew what the "Depression" was then. There were no CNBC, no economic blogs. Depression from the markets had entered into people's lives. One fine day, there was a cool dude walking on the roads wearing a black T-shirt with the words "DEPRESSION". All the people caught hold of him and started beating the hell out of him. They cursed him, that because of him the world economy was in danger. With just an ounce of life left, the cool dude started explaining people what "Depression" is. Depression is not a slogan on a T-shirt. There was so much depression in their lives, that they had stopped shopping, which was the only known catharsis for the modern man. This had created a huge imbalance in demand supply chain which in turn had caused depression in stock market. People understood what he was pontificating, they started living more happily, shopped like crazy, pumped in money to the market, and by the end of 1930, the world was out of "Depression".

Seriously, what did you think of the story? Was it brilliant? Did I remind you of Khalil Gibran?

Replace "Depression" with "Kaala Bandar", the "lack of enthusiasm to shopping" with "the evil thoughts in human mind", the cool dude in black T-shirt with Abhishek Bachchan in a fake accent, you get the essence of Delhi 6. Essence, not the story, mind you. You cannot get everything of Rakyesh Mehra's movies in one go. They have to be multi-layered, like Rishi Kapoor's chin.

So, Mehra must have thought something like this one saturday afternoon.

  • Arre yaar, I want to make a movie on Delhi. I want to show how people live there, the narrow lanes, the color, smell, taste of the city. Come on, the Bollywood fans are overdosed with Punjabis, they will love this.
  • How about having some abstract concept like "Mota Ulloo" or "Langda Haathi" or something...may be a "Kaala Bandar"? Its just symbolic okkay? (Yes, I can even use this "okkay" in the movie, will generate a few laughs) So, "Kaala Bandar" is something like "evil" inside all of us, that makes it a pretty intelligent movie. Like study of the dark human side or some such.
  • I am famous for drawing parallels. So, let me take Ram Leela and show how similar and contradictory it is to the contemporary India. Serial lighting in Ram Leela from which I draw parallels! Wow, sounds profound, sounds profound!
  • I dont want anyone to categorize my movie. My canvas is big, you know. So I will have many concepts - the NRI dilemma, corrupt police, hindu-muslim tensions, caste based discrimination, forced arranged marriages, jalebis (two kinds), young kids discovering smoke (oh yes, never before has anyone shown it in Indian cinema).

Ting. Mehra gets a forward on his Motorola.
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his Customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?"
The boy takes the quarters and leaves. "What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store. "Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar?"
The boy licked his cone and replied, "Because the day I take the dollar, the game's over!"

Hahaha. Mehra laughs his heart out on reading the 2005 joke. I want to have this in my movie, it sounds kewl (Hey, I liked the sound of it, will ask AB to have an accent like that)

This is how my friends movies like Delhi 6 are made. A complete fake take on the study of the darker human side, contemporary politics and multi layered narration. I badly miss the unapologetic junk of yesteryears. Karishma Kapoor with bushy eye brows. Govinda in his technocolor pants. Raveena Tandon wearing horrendous skirts. Shakti Kapoor and Kader Khan. We have not lost the crapness factor yet, but we have lost all that sincerity.

Monday, February 16, 2009

Comparison


Black Men. Big History. What a comparison!
Next what? Compare Karunanidhi with Stevie Wonder? :)

P.S: In a blog as old, surprisingly this is the first photo!

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